If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
