We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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