i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
