Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
