There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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