I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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