There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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