Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize