it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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