Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
