Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
