Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize