look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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