Dual....:-)
Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize