return my video game
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
