): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
two words...techno handjob
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Randomize