But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
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