The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
