It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
