I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
