hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
