I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
