with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Use "feeling words"
Yay
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
This is classic penis vs brain.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
