you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
