Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
