Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
