Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
