If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
