There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
