My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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