question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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