She just used a chaser for red wine.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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