i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
