Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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