I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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