just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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