We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
