plz talk dirty to me
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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