Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(626): View more from California

Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.

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(302): View more from Delaware

I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.

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(618): View more from Illinois

we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning

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(785): View more from Kansas

this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln

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(316): View more from Kansas

Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.

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(817): View more from Texas

I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.

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(219): View more from Indiana

I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.

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(208): View more from Idaho

The cops high fived after they tackled you

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(352): View more from Florida

not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this

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