you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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