with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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