the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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