I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
