so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Are we still banned from the library?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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