I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
