Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
