How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Randomize
