I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
