I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
