Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
