I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
